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"When Addressing Someone As “Auntie” Ends In A Nightmare"

Post on: March 16, 2018

Like most Singaporeans, I address those very much older with the utmost respect. I liberally dish out salutations like “Aunty” or “Uncle” without batting an eyelid.

My own experience emboldened me that it’s a harmless expression and the right thing to say. Whenever I greet an elderly neighbour with “Good morning Auntie”, she reciprocates with a “Thank you Uncle” — this despite me being 30 years her junior.

Such anecdotes show that senior citizens who aren’t conversant in English, connote such terms as something respectful or as an appreciation. Age is not a determinant… Until an incident ran counter to my belief!

The year was 2012 — my ex-colleagues and I sat down at a Kopi-Tiam joint for a cuppa. When an elderly waitress came, Mathew cried out: “Two Coke, 1 Tea and 1 Milo, Auntie.”

Mathew’s last word was enough to bring the house down. The waitress took offence with the term and fumed, “What?… You got no manners ah?”

We were dumbfounded and were wondering if Mathew had uttered anything unsavoury. Suddenly she yelled, “Auntie, Auntie?” “I Not old ok!” (Actually, she was about 20 years our senior and the term seemed apt, nevertheless debatable).

A few diners began taking note of the incident and were amused by the spectacle unfolding before their very eyes! And we were the protagonist of their free entertainment! My other colleagues and I were suppressing our delight and couldn’t wait to poke fun at poor Mathew.

She finally came back with the drinks. Just as we thought peace had finally prevailed — she rattled more fancifully with a renewed sense of vigour. And she ended her tirade with a jingle, “Auntie, auntie, your head Empty!”

And to her consternation, we couldn’t help giggling — it was recited so spontaneously and melodiously. She glared… and all of a sudden, smiled at us. Her anger had dissipated unexpectedly just as it erupted without a warning. We felt relieved — our laughter at the opportune moment quelled the tempest!

Mathew had uttered the word respectfully but “aunty” so unwittingly courted so much unwanted attention upon herself.

This incident was a revelation indeed — I use the term judiciously thereafter. And I dare not use it on strangers unless they depict a motherly figure or come across as very much older than me. Mathew had inadvertently opened my eyes…

I don’t know if the story rings a bell with our readers, but the tune, “Aunty, aunty, your head Empty” still rings in my ears! Share it with your kakis (buddies) — invite them to Like us on Facebook.

By Shaji Thomas Varughese

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